196.21 lbs (89kg)

So Im on a liquid diet and Iv lost 5.1lbs in total this week.I thought id weigh heavier today coz i had a cream fostino choco chip yesterday.Feeling in a good mood gonna let me smoothie maker charge so I can have a glass of my homemade smoothies.just wrote in my dairy and yes I am loosing the muscle mass very fast.Gonna have a hot shower if the shower IS hot and see my fat body.naked. Didnt get up till 4pm today this evening I thought staff would wake me up but nope.Anyways Im loosing the fat and iM happy about it need to get down to the 100's soon.Staff arn't letting me go past 3 meals a day which is sooo stupid like im starving myself as it is.Need to loose another 40lbs to get me under 100's..SO TOMORROW I'll be having 2cups-maybe 3 cups of coffee if I wake u p before 10am. and have 2 smoothies ,1 for lunch and another for dinner time.The rest of the night if i neeeed to Ill drink a cuppa milk to get me through the night.I really need to keep up my reading and on friday is my last day of liquids coz on friday Im going to the cinema and ordering a large coke,large popcorn and a bag of chocolate and on saturday go back onto liquids again

197.8Lbs HAPPY NEW YEARS

Okay so Im just under 200lbsand I bought myself a new diary in claires for 15EUROS and Im writing up my goals,tips into it at the moment. I have Arts N Crafts of paints and crayola but Im not sure HOW TO paint?Like i wanna be able to draw my feelings onto the page but I dont know what kind of picture I will draw to look good and not just paint onto the page!.Feeling kinda hungry staff goes

You have 3bites out of that raw carrot and I will give you your cigargette

So with my ED I did 3bites and then I relised that I shouldnt have to eat 3bites to get a smoke...Im really annoyed now.ANyways Ill probably just drink some coffee to keep me from collpasing and blacking out..Just had chocolate spread onto my white toast so Im not having any food till tonight when Ill allow myself to have MORE toast with jam not more choclate spread. Just so I dont go to bed hungry-nobody wants that I shouldnt have to feel bad or upset for having a hungry tummy.BEing hungry is a good thing but not late @ night when Your cold and hungry💙 just thinking of my goal weight I mean my ultimate goal weight is like 88lbs I wonder what that looks like on me like im 5'5 and most of the thinspo I seen are peeps who are under 100lbs.Im over 200lbs so that means I have to loose about 50lbs at least to get me anywhere near 100lbs.

32.87 OBESE Checking in+LAZY DAYS

Okay so Iv lost about 0.5kg since last time.Im just checking in my weight so I can keep up the blog.NewsFlash!!- The shower is COLD and staff won't give me any ciggerttes unless I take a shower.I just got dressed and staff were like "you smell of urine" I PURGED the last 2 nights yesterday and the day before yesterday..Need to loose 50lbs like Iv said..Ill just check my shower and see if its hot now.. Starting my diet now 7pm I will try my bestie to keep under 200calories 400 600 800calories

Anyways Iv Lost 11Lbs this week and I want to get into a size 6-8 again so im sticking to liquids @ Night time.And drinking alot will help burn off the fat sooo watch this space and HAPPY NEW YEARS

New years diet plan ! 33.17 BMI moderately obese

27/12/2021 Okay so my diet is out of control with the christmas dinner and the binge eating and all that goes with the hoildays.I must of gained 7lbs in one day by drinking a frostino mint choc chip.😐(●'◡'●)༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ So I wanna get down to 30+BMI and under 200lbs aswell.I think Ill do the 2468 Diet starting tomoorow.Ill keep you updated on how Im doing.The centre is isolating our selfs from everybody at the moment so Im not going out today and not tomorrow aswell.Staff buy me a box of smokes incase I need some but Im not allowed to go outside not even for a drive around the place.Ill Ring John and see if he wants to meet up with me on Saturday.Im on a restrivte diet and only having whats on my safe food list but since Im doing the 2468diet I have to count my calories a day.I wanna know how much I can loose for this diet to work I have to be getting under 1000CALORIES a day.No more then 800calories.So anyways I think I might buy some ED books to keep me happy -for while..Im currently 90kg I need to get under 190 before I see my bf on saturday///

200.6lbs

I weighed in and lost 5.8 lbs- in 5days So today I weighed myself and iv lost under 6lbs in 5days. Okay sooo... Im getting the nintendo switch game "Live" and Going to buy myself a Pepsi maX(ocalories).Staff told me that I have to wait till after lunch before I can go any where.I just had a ciggie and I have to wait for a least a half an hour till staff have there break (There lunch) I looked @ the lentil Soup tin and I thought that it would make me fat.Soo Im going to have a 40calorie hot chocolate instead.I need to loose another 6lbs to get towards my goal (Which is under 200lbs) I hate eating I keep thinking "It will make me fat". Im only having 2slices of Toast/Jam 2 X a day morning and night before bedtime.Just so I don't collapse.Im currently looking @ BOnespo to keep me feeling empty and light.

I just uploaded my favourite thinspo.Enjoy.

Waiting for Christmas 🎅🎄 Christmas 2021 playlist

A letter to Ana 206.4lbs.

 Soo as you know that you are really fat and you need to loose around 40lbs to get you under 100lbs in weight.You should only have whats on your "safe" food list and not to eat anything outside of that.Drinking plenty of strawberrry water will help flush out the fat and help you to poop more often.For every 10lbs lost you get a reward for that.Wheather its a massage,Nails,hair,or simply just going to take part in aqua aerobics(to meet fat people for some reverse thinspo) Listening to music while playing on the laptop usually helps stop the cravings for a short amount of time. You may binge on listening to music,watching thinspo videos or get your mind on ease by going for a long walk in the woods.You dont need to do much exercise but when you feel like you need "a push" then go out even to the shops in the shopping centre and look @ small clothes.Have 2 showers a day will help fight back fat.(You see your body naked and youd like to change it then hop into the shower and skip dinner only have whats on your "safe" food and not to eat ANYTHING ESLE. If your feeling cold ,wear a big hoodie.If your really hungery and you cant afford any more calories then go as long as you can and if you start getting dizzy then drink a cup of low fat milk and some toast (with maramalade) .Weight yourself as much as youd like.Become a vegetarian that cuts off most of food to eat like sandwichs and wraps  and anything with chicken in it like chicken soups. You'll feel more and more pure.

So last week I lose 10lbs yay go me! right? no. I weighed myself today and I have gained over 8lbs.I really wanna make a n effort so Im starting today right now... No more eating out,No more binge eating.

Things I can improve on:

💜Have 2 showers

Go christmas shopping with my key worker ( Liz) and buy the "live" game for nintendo switch.

Buy new pair of Pj's in L

Buy gingerbread man cutlery set in Pennys for 13EUROS

Loose another 10lbs by christmas and keep it off no more gaining weight!

Get  into a size 10 by next year some time soon.

Enjoy christmas